711bet Reflections on Motherhood, Careers and Identity

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To the Editor:711bet

Re “What I Wish Someone Had Told Me About Motherhood,” by Daniela J. Lamas (Opinion guest essay, Nov. 29):

I had my first baby when I was in law school. I thought my career was the end-all-be-all. I defined the word feminism as the ability to have a high-prestige career.

Then I had a baby, and my idea of feminism became so much larger and nuanced. Being a mother became the biggest privilege in my life. Watching my baby learn about the world and acquire language became the biggest miracle I have ever witnessed.

I feel as though my understanding of feminism now aligns with the experience of being a woman. Having children let me see the complexity. I don’t think that women should be forced to have children because to do it right is frequently a thankless job. It is truly a labor of love.

Having children shouldn’t be a requirement of being a woman. But the potential to have children defines womanhood and results in many decisions and shuts many pathways for women — whether a woman wants or even can have children. The potential of motherhood affects in myriad ways, large and small, every individual who identifies as female.

I will never for a minute regret becoming a mom. Never, not even after losing my youngest child. I revel in motherhood, but this isn’t the identity that should define me for my entire life.

But the move backfired in a way that few supporters expected. Californians in 2021 actually tossed nearly 50 percent more plastic bags, by weight, than when the law first passed in 2014, according to data from CalRecycle, California’s recycling agency.

His debunked claims about Haitian migrants stealing and eating their neighbors’ pets in Springfield, Ohio, helped stir a firestorm over immigration in that community, which has dealt with bomb threats and evacuations after Mr. Trump made his comments.

I hope my girls are blessed with motherhood. Still, it is not the identity that should control their professional opportunities and decisions as they enter adulthood.

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